# Messy Parents Sermon transcript from Cross Church El Mirage. Series: Family Date: May 25, 2025 Watch: https://crosschurchcares.com/el-mirage/episodes/messy-parents ## Summary Are you navigating the challenges of parenting? What if your influence could shape the next generation's faith? Discover how intentional parenting can lead to less mess and more purpose. Let’s dive in together! ## Transcript Welcome to Cross Church. My name is Tyler and I serve as campus pastor right here at Cross Church Elmarrage. And I want to welcome you to service today. Before we get started, I want to make you aware of a couple of ways that you can connect with us today. If you have a phone with you, you can send a text message with the word crossurch, no space, to the number 9400. Or if you'd like to use the cards that are in the seat back in front of you. We've got three cards that'll direct you on ways that you can get connected this week. The first is the new card. If you're new to Cross Church over the last few weeks, we would love to connect with you. Take some time to fill out that card during our service today and drop it in one of the black boxes and then we'll follow up with you this week with some more information. The next card is the next card. Take some time to use that card if you're interested in taking some next steps in your faith journey. Things like baptism, joining a group, or even serving. And then lastly, and I believe most importantly, is the prayer card. And I want to guarantee you that if you take time today to fill out that prayer card, all of those come to me and I get to pray over each of them individually. So if you've got things big or small going on in your life, please feel free to share those with us. We'd be happy to pray over them. As we get prepared for some God-honoring worship, I want to encourage you to go into service today with an expectant spirit. We know that God will do big things in our midst. And so, I want to encourage you to enter this time with an expectant spirit. Now, let's get prepared for some God honor. [Music] Hey, good morning, Cross Church. Let's all stand together. Let's all get ready to [Music] worship. Let's sing this together. You've been good. You've been good. Good for all my life. See nothing good ever change my mind. You never break a promise. You confident in all you do. Yours is the way, the truth, the life that I choose. Oh, I know that. I know you will never let me go, every low, every high. You are faithful all the time. Oh, I've tasted and I see you've been so so good to me. that I know that I know you're faithful all the time. Oh, you're faithful the time. Oh, I will look to the left or right. I will keep heaven in my side. No, I will not be shaking. Nothing is moving me. I've got a bigure of the things I cannot see. Oh, I know that. I know you will never let me go. Every low, every high, you are faithful all the time. I taste it and I'll see. You've been so so good to me. But I know that I [Applause] know you're faithful all the time. Oh, you're faithful all the time. Oh, I won't sit on the word of mouth. God, I stand on yours instead. All of my hope, all of my faith, all of it in your name. And the world cannot deny. All that you've done in my life. All of my days, all of my praise, all of it. Jesus. Let's sing that again. I won't stand on word of mine. God, I stand on yours instead. All of my hope, all of my faith, all of this in your name. The world cannot deny all that you've done in my life. All of my days, all of my praise. All the new Jesus name. All of my days, all of my praise. I want to live Jesus name. Oh, I know that I know you won't never let me go. Every low, every high, you are faithful all the time. Oh, I know that. And I know you won't ever let me go. Every low and every high, you are faithful all the time. I tasted and I've seen you so so good to me. But I know that I know you're faithful. [Music] Oh, you're fine. Oh, [Music] faithful all the time. Oh, we're faithful all the time. Yeah. Let's give our God some [Music] praise. Hey, Psalm 92 verse4 it says, "For you have made me rejoice, Lord, by what you have done. I will shout for joy because of the works of your hands." Let's sing this together. When I was lost, when I was lost and all alone, your presence was where I found home. You were there and you're here right now. In every high and every low, you never left me without hope. You were good and you're good. Right [Music] now I've witnessed your faithfulness. I've seen you breathe life within. So I'll pour out my praise again. You're worthy, God. You're worthy of all of it. Your promise is never fail. I've got stories I'll live to tell. So I'll pour out my praise again. You're worthy, God. You're worthy of all of it. You left the throne and chose the cross. Laid down your life to rescue us. The Savior then, the Savior now. But even death was not the end. You conquered hell so I can live. Resurrecting men. Resurrecting now. Resurrecting men. Resurrecting now. [Music] I've witnessed your faithfulness. I've seen you breathe life with it. So I pour out my praise again. You're worthy, God. You're worthy of all of it. Your promises never fail. I've got stories I'll live to tell. So I pour out my praise again. You're worthy, God. You're worthy of all. Yes, I will praise you with my whole [Music] life. You're good and I've witnessed it. You're strong and I've witnessed it. You're constant. I've witnessed it and I'm confident. I see it again and again. You love and I've witnessed it. You heal and I've witnessed it. You save and I've witnessed it. and I'm confident. I'll see it again and again. You're good and I've witnessed it. You're strong and I've witnessed it. You're constant. I've witnessed it and I'm confident. I'll see it again. You love and I've witnessed it. You heal and I've witnessed it. You say that I've witnessed it and I'm confident. I'll see it again and again. I've witnessed your faithfulness. I've seen you bring life within. So I pour out my praise again. You're worthy, God. You're worthy of it. Your promise is never fail. I've got stories I live to tell. So I pour out my praise again. You're worthy, God. You're worthy of all. To the broken, I'll witness it. To the hurting, I'll witness it. To the lost, I will witness it. And I'll tell them this. I'll tell them what I'll witness to my family. I'll witness it to the city. I'll witness it to the nations. I'll witness it. And I'll tell them this. I'll tell them what I'm witnessing. [Music] Praise God from whom all blessings flow. Praise him all creatures here below. Praise him above you heavenly host. Praise father, son, and holy ghost. [Music] Praise Father, Son, and Holy. [Music] The Lord is my shepher and he is everything I need. So I will not worry. I will not fear the enmy. He said that he loves me. He said that he's with me even though I walk through the valley. shadow and death. And still I know he has good plans. He has good plans for me. So I will take heart in deserts and he has good plans. He has good plans for me. If I know my father, I know my [Music] father. Praise the father, praise the son, and holy ghost. The Lord is my savior. So why should I doubt my victory? Why would I question the rod and the staff that comes acquires the waters and quiets the storm inside? So what could be [Music] better than walking with him when I believe he has good plans. He has good things for me. So I will take heart deserts and waters. He has good things. He has good things for me. So I know my father. I know my father. He has good. He has good things for me. So I will take heart presence in He has good things. He has good for me. If I know my father, I know my [Music] [Music] father [Music] Surely your goodness and mercy will follow after me. You will find me. I'll be dwelling in the house of God. Surely your goodness and mercy will follow after me. [Music] I'll be in the house. Surely goodness will follow after me. So you will find me cuz I'll be dwelling in the house. Surely goodness, mercy will follow after me. will not find me cuz I'll be dwelling in the house of God. He has good He has good things for me. So I will take the desert. He has goodness. He [Music] has for me. If I know my father, I know my father. Good [Music] place. If I know my father, I know my father. [Music] Good place. I know my father. I know my [Music] father. Heat. Heat. [Music] Heat. Heat. Heat. Heat. [Music] [Music] Oh my [Music] Oh, praise and holy. [Music] Amen. You go and grab a seat. What a way to start our time together today in worship. Whether you're here in the room or if you're watching online, just want to let you know we're so glad that you made the choice to worship with us today. Hey, I've got a couple of things. I want to get you up to speed on events and such that are coming up. Uh but before we get into that, I want to introduce myself. My name is Tyler and I serve as campus pastor here at Cross Church and we're so glad that you made the choice to be with us today. One of the things I want to encourage you on in terms of some next steps is to use one of these cards. We've got three cards that are in the seat back in front of you and just want to share briefly about what those are. The first card, this orange card, is the new card. So, if you're joining us today for maybe the first or second or third time, this is a great opportunity for you to communicate with us. If you have in ministries that you're have uh maybe some interest in, you want to get some more information about, use this new card to fill that information out, drop it in one of the boxes later in our services to do that. Uh the second card is the next card. So, if you're here today and maybe you're looking to take a next step of serving or getting information about ministries or whatever the case may be, using the next card is how you can communicate that with us. And then finally, uh is the prayer card. And for us, prayer is not a secondary thing. It is absolutely primary. So, if you've got something going on in your life, big or small, feel free to communicate that with us on that prayer card and then you can drop it in one of the boxes later in our services. Well, hey, I want to let you know about a few things that are coming up. The first thing that's coming up is vacation Bible school. All right. And we are excited. Yes, it's going to be an absolute blast. Uh when you come to church next Sunday, uh you will be in the middle of a camping themed BBS. So, prepare your heart. It's going to be a blast. Uh so if you've got kids, make sure to register them. But don't forget today if you're a part of the group that's helping us to pull this event off. We've got a quick huddle right after service. We're going to talk through some details, nail down some final information with you. So make sure that if you're helping with VBS that you'll stick around for that huddle and I just got to celebrate with you guys. We've actually got about 60 kids already registered for our vacation bible school. Yeah, it's a blast. And so make sure to finish inviting your neighbors and friends or just random kids on the street. Just invite them all. Right. I saw that our fifth and sixth grade last week took s'mores, Pop-Tarts, uh, stapled invite cards to them and handed it out to their friends. So, what a blast. My daughter told me on the way in this morning, she said, "Hey, Dad, by the way, I invited five of my friends from school to join us at VBS." So, we're so excited, hoping that those invites will truly change a life. So, we're excited about VBS. The second thing I want to let you know about involves golf. Any golfers in the room? All right. Or some that attempt to be golfers, right? Uh, hey, we've got our collectivewide golf tournament that's coming up June 7th. So, if you want to join, you can bring a foresome or a single. All the information is on the website, but this is actually not just a golf tournament for the sake of golf. We're actually raising money to continue planting churches. Uh we have seen an incredible work of God here on the corner of Poria and Elmarrage and it's made us as a collective hungry to see that happen over and over again and so we're uh raising money to make that happen. So if you're interested in golfing again the website crosschurchcares.com/events you can get more information and you can register there as well. Hey the third and final thing I want to let you know about I'm personally really excited about. We're kicking off on June the 11th. That's a Wednesday night. Our summer series. Now, here's what our summer series is. Our sermon-based small groups that we call Bible groups take time off during the summer. And in that space this year, we wanted to sew intentionally into that time. And so, we're kicking off June 11th, our summer series. Now, if you're interested in what that is, we're offering three different groups that will meet every single Wednesday from June 11th to the end of July on Wednesday nights from 6:30 to 7:30. Those three groups are youth group, which we're really excited about. students were like, "Finally, we're meeting weekly." Yes, over the summer we are doing that. That's first. Second, we'll have a women's group. There's a group that's doing a book study for women specifically. And then finally, we've got a group of men that are going to gather specifically over the summer. And I got to tell you guys, we're so excited to see what God's going to do during that time as we dive in intentionally over the summer. And so, hey, as we kind of wrap all of that up and prepare for a message, I got to tell you, I sat through the sermon and uh it is a 10 out of 10. I can say that because I'm not preaching today. We've got Michael preaching and I really believe this is a word that will change some people's lives today. And so, I want to encourage you to really tune into what God has to say for you today. But, as we wrap up this time, we want to create a space where you can give. So here in a minute on the screen you'll see a video uh timer and what it'll have is some ways that you can give so that we can see more lives changed, more churches planted and the kingdom grow. So let's take a minute to consider that. [Music] [Music] [Music] now. I'm on. Now I'm on. Okay. Morning. Uh, how are you all doing? Good. Well, good. I'm great. Thanks for asking. Uh, so today we're going to be in 1 Samuel chapter 2. Uh, so you can flip there if you need help finding it. It's right before 2 Samuel. Yeah, you're welcome. Uh if you were here last week, uh Lyall preached on marriage and uh if you grew up, if you were a kid at one point in time, which all of you were, you probably heard the song or the nursery rhyme, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes a baby carriage. A baby in a baby carriage. Yeah, you got to have the baby in the carriage, too. Uh but that's what we're going to be talking about today. We're going to be focusing on the baby carriage. And we're going to be talking about parenting. So, uh just if you are in the room and you are not a parent yet, please do not tune me out. Uh we do have a message from God's word for you as well. So please stay dialed in as we talk through that. I know we have uh different types of families here and I want to be clear that when I talk about parents uh I'm talking about a lot of different parents. So if you have uh parental influence on a child in your life, whether you're biological parent, adoptive parent, stepparent, grandparent, uh uncle, aunt, guardian, uh all of that. When I say parent, that's who I'm talking about today. Okay, we good there? All right, cool. Um, so let's dig into uh 1st Samuel chapter 2. Uh, but before we do that, I actually want to give you a little context around Hannah. So chapter 1, uh, we're going to be introduced to Hannah and her prayer. Uh, so in chapter 1, Hannah prayed and thanked God for who he is, even though her desire was to have children, but she was barren. Uh, later in chapter 1, we are introduced to the two sons of Eli, Hoffne, and Phineas. Um, they were priests of the Lord. Uh Hannah and her husband Elcana, Elcana, Elcana, whatever. Uh I don't know how to say it, but I'm just making it up. So uh Elcana and Hannah went every year to give sacrifices to the Lord. Uh Hannah actually was bullied by Elana's other wife, uh because she could not have children. So if you read that chapter, she actually Hannah is actually crying and she didn't even want to eat. I don't know if that's ever happened to you, but I don't think I've ever not wanted to eat. Okay, Mikey likey chocolate. All right. Um so we fast forward a little bit. Uh we see Hannah praying fervently that God would bless her with a son. Not only that, but that she would dedicate him to the Lord and that he would vow to serve a life for the Lord all the days of his life. Uh Hannah is actually at the tabernacle. She's sitting she's praying. She's she's muttering to the Lord and Eli the priest is sitting there with her. He looks at Hannah. She's not praying very loudly. It's kind of muttering under her breath. Uh he looks at her and he accuses her of being drunk. And I think that's come some of the foreshadowing we'll see in that chapter. the all the things that were going on at the tabernacle. Uh Eli assumed that she was drunk. So God ended up blessing Hannah with a son named him Samuel and she dedicated him to the Lord and he was weaned taken away basically to serve the Lord when he was weaned off of her about two or three years of age. Uh Hannah and Okana show here that they care more about God's approval than about the approval of people. They wanted to please God and gave up to the Lord the very thing that they had prayed for, they had yearned for and longed for that God would bless them with. They gave it up to the Lord. The very thing that they prayed for. Uh and then we end up seeing the mess happening with Eli and his two sons. And Hannah and Okana wanted less of the mess. So let's start reading in 1st Samuel chapter 2. Uh starting in verse 12. It says Eli's sons were wicked men. They did not respect the Lord. Let's pause there. Uh the Bible says that Eli's sons were wicked. They were vile. They were corrupt. Even though they were priests in the tabernacles, they did not know God. That leads us to our key thought for today. Just because we know of God, it does not equate to knowing God. See, sitting in church today doesn't make you a Christian as much as sitting in Dunkin Donuts makes you a donut. Shout out donuts. Uh Eli's sons were around the tabernacle, but they were never trained to know God personally. They had rituals without relationship. And the question is for you all that have an influence in kids' lives, which is all of us. How are we helping them know the Lord more? How are we pointing them closer to Jesus? Some questions to think through. Who am I influencing? Who am I having an impact on? Who am I interacting with? Is my walk closer to Jesus? Is it pointing them closer to Jesus? What does it look like practically for us? Well, for all of us, God has called us to something. He gives us different roles, different positions, different responsibilities, whether that's at school, work, church, but most importantly in the home. The least uh the most important roles you have are what the least amount of people can call you. Does that make sense? So only God can call you you can be son of God, daughter of God, right? Only one person can call you husband or wife. Maybe a few can call you uh mom or dad. A lot of people can call you co-orker, boss, leader, teacher. And so the people that uh that you influence the most is the least amount of people can call you. God calls you to disciple others with your life and let your light shine to be intentional around that. Let's continue reading in verse 13. It says, "Or the priest's share of the sacrifices from the people. When anyone offered a sacrifice, the priest's servants would come with a three-pronged meat fork while the meat was boiling and plunge it into the container, kettle, cauldron, or cooking pot. Uh the pre the priest would claim for himself whatever the meat fork brought up." This is the way they treated all the Israelites who came there to Shiloh. Even before the fat was burned, the priest servant would come and say to the one who was sacrificing, "Give the priest some meat to roast because he won't accept boiled meat from you, only raw." Verse 16. If that person says to him, "The fat must be burned first, then you can take whatever you want for yourself." The servant would reply, "No, I insist that you hand it over right now. If you don't, I will take it by force." So the servant sin was very severe in the presence of the Lord because the men treated the Lord's offering with contempt. See back in the time of Moses when people brought a sacrifice to God, it was supposed to be shared in three ways. The first part would go to God. The second part went to the priests and the third part went to the person who was bringing that offering. The Bible says that the priest should get the breast and the shoulder of the animal. But hundreds of years later, Eli's sons didn't follow that rule. Instead, they just stuck a big fork into the pot and they took whatever the heck they wanted to take, totally ignoring what God had said. See, God was supposed to get the first part, especially the fat, which was considered the best part of the animal. And that's how I know barbecue is biblical because God loves that aroma of fat. So, let's go. Uh, it was also a way of showing honor to God, giving God the best. But Eli's sons didn't want to wait. They took their share before God got his. They showed that they were selfish and proud, thinking they deserve the best before God did. Eli's sons didn't want boiled meat. They wanted the raw meat. Why? Why is that an important detail to include in there? I think a couple things there. Number one, uh they wanted to cook it how the heck they wanted to cook it. They said, "Hey, I want to roast it. I want to make it taste better." Like, have you ever boiled chicken? Don't do that. Okay? Unless you're making soup, please don't do that. If you ever invite us over to have boiled chicken, I'm going to say, "You know what? We're busy. um not going to make it. Uh let me know when you have some ribs. Um but also secondly, they wanted to sell it for money. They were selfish. They were greedy. They wanted the money for themselves. And so they were taking away what God's offering should have been for their own gain. If someone tried to stand up to them or follow the right way, Eli's sons would say, "Give it to me now or I will take it by force." They weren't just greedy. They were bullies. So imagine you come here on a Sunday. Not to uh I'm gonna use Pastor Tyler as an example because he's right by the black boxes right there. So, it works perfectly. Okay. So, let's say you come Sunday and you want to give your offering. You're like, "Okay, I just got paid. I need to give God his first." Cool. Come to the black box. Tyler is standing there. He's like, "Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. What are you doing?" You're like, "Oh, I'm going to give to the Lord." He says, "Let me see your envelope." So, you open it up. Got a bunch of cash to put in to give to the Lord. He's like, "Let me see that." He takes some for himself. And you're like, "What? What are you doing?" You're like, "Well, this is this is mine. Like, this this belongs to me, right?" He's You're like, "No, this is God's." Ty's like, "You know, I'm going to take a little more. A little more." You're like, "No, I'm not going to let you do that." He's like, "Give me your money now or I'm going to throat punch you." Okay. That's what Eli's sons were doing. They were throat punching people, making them not want to come worship the Lord. Because of how they were acting, they were stealing, threatening, being selfish. People didn't even want to come to the tabernacle to bring their offerings to God. They were pushing people away from worshiping God. literally the opposite of what they should have been doing as priests. As we keep reading, we'll see the contrast between Samuel and Eli's sons. Uh go down to verse 18. Samuel served in the Lord's presence. This mere boy was dressed in the linen ephod. Each year, his mother made him a little robe and took it to him when she went with her husband to offer the annual sacrifice. That's a really cool, sweet moment between mother and son. Every year, Hannah would make a robe, a new one, uh for Samuel uh in the tabernacle. I think as we think through that and as as a parent, if we were in that situation, we'd probably be thinking some of the same things maybe Hannah was thinking like, "Oh, does is Samuel thinking of me? Does he miss us? Uh is he growing up? I wonder how tall he is right now. May maybe he met a girl at the tabernacle, you know, as he gets up in age. Uh does he think of us?" And so it's a cool thing that they still get to be a part of Samuel's life and impact him. Um, even though they only get to see him once a year, they still had a huge impact on him. Verse 20, Eli would bless Okana and his wife. May the Lord give you children by this woman in place of the one she has given to the Lord. Then they would go home. The Lord paid attention to Hannah's need, and she conceived and gave birth to three sons and two daughters. Meanwhile, the boy Samuel grew up in the presence of the Lord. I love how it says in verse 21 that the Lord paid attention to Hannah's needs. God pays attention to our needs. He knows our heart's desires. He knows the things we think about. He knows the things we worry about. He cares about the specifics. And not only does God answer Hannah's prayer with a yes, he actually far surpasses her sacrifice by giving uh five times the amount of kids basically. So far surpasses her sacrifice. And God hears our prayers. He hears your prayers to help you be a better parent. He hears your prayers for your children that may not know him yet. that they would come to know him and surrender and give their lives and accept his free gift of salvation. He hears your prayers when you feel like you've messed up and you blew it again as a parent. There is less of a mess when we parent on purpose. There was less of a mess when we parent on purpose. Even though Eli's sons were doing wrong, Samuel was different. God had a plan because he saw how corrupt Eli's sons were. He set things in motion to bring Samuel into the tabernacle. Since Eli's sons weren't fit to lead, God raised up someone else who would be. See, if we don't get to our calling, God's going to make his plan happen either way, whether you get to be part of it or not. So, God brought people up because even when we fail as parents and mess up, God's work doesn't stop. Even as a young boy, Samuel stood out because of how he served the Lord. He wore a linen ephod, a special priest outfit, showing he was already set apart for God's work. So Samuel had little tasks to do in the tabernacle, right? He was walking around lighting lamps, putting away supplies, learning music, but even the small things, Samuel was faithful because that's what God had called him to do. And he was doing it with the right heart. We cannot change our kids' hearts as much as we want to. We can try to modify their behavior, but we actually cannot produce godly children. Our job is to live the lives that follow Jesus, plant seeds, and pray that God does the growth because that's his role in it. 1 Corinthians 3:6, Paul says, "I planted Apollos water, but who gave the growth?" God gave the growth. We didn't give the growth. God does the growing. The reality is that you cannot save your kids. That's God's job. Stop trying to do God's job. What does it look like to parent on purpose? The Bible tells us firstly, deny yourself, take up your cross, and follow him. The single best thing we can do for our children is to follow Jesus wholeheartedly. Preach the gospel to yourself every single day. When we parent on purpose, we forgive quickly. We are slow to anger. We are quick to listen, and we are slow to speak. We don't accidentally walk closer to Jesus. we must be intentional and do it on purpose. So for me, I didn't grow up in a Christian household. Um I didn't grow up going to church. Uh when I was 5 years old, my my dad actually cheated on my mom. We weren't Christians and my mom chose to leave him at that time. We bounced around, lived in a bunch of different states, but ultimately I grew up in a single parent home my whole life. When I was 13 years old, a co-orker of my mom had invited us to this church. Not this church, a different church. This wasn't here back then. when I was young um younger. And so I remember going to this church and the church that we did go to a few times a year, maybe once or twice if that, I was bored out of my mind. I remember sitting there as a kid. Uh I remember I brought a a Sony Walkman with a cassette tape in it and I weaved a uh earbud through my sleeve so that I could listen to music while the service was going on because I had no idea what they were saying. I didn't understand what they were saying and it was boring. But I remember going to this different church. They had drums. They had electric guitar. I'm like, they had a rock band. Like, this is amazing. And God started drawing me in with the music. And eventually I I we kept coming back and kept coming back. Uh and I eventually gave my life to the Lord. I remember at a youth conference when I was about 13 years of age. Um and I grew up and I grew closer to Jesus. And I knew that I wanted to be the best father that I could be someday. Still working on it, still in progress, but little by little, we're getting closer to Jesus. And I might not have known what that was supposed to look like by my father, but God surrounded me with people in the church that were examples that I needed to see. Their lives impacted me in major ways. And I got to see firsthand what a father is supposed to look like. For those who are not parents in the room, kids are watching. Kids are watching how you respond, how you react, the lives that you live, they're watching. And our kids need examples in this church. They need to see what it looks like to live for Jesus on purpose. And God has you here on purpose. It's not an accident that you are here. You are planting seeds that you don't even know you're planting. My wife Renee and I, she's here. Shout out Renee. Uh we we started dating and back in uh when we were in high school and then in 2004 we got married. Uh we actually wanted to have a puppy first and then a baby, but God had other plans. Um we actually uh got pregnant four months after we got married. We were young. Didn't know what the heck we were doing. U but God blessed us with three amazing, awesome daughters. Uh shout out Olivia. She's our oldest. That's right. I was going to embarrass you. You knew it. Um she's 19. Uh middle one, Mackenzie, is 16 and our youngest is eight. Elelliana. And so basically three teenagers. So please pray for us. No, not I'm not joking. Please pray for us. Um fast forward a little bit to 2015. I remember I get a call from my mom. She's like, "Hey, how how are you?" I'm like, "I'm all right." like, "Hey, just wanted to let you know that your father passed away." I didn't know how to think about that. I didn't know how to react to that. I wasn't sure if I was going to even go to the funeral. We prayed through it. We felt God was saying we were supposed to be there. So Renee and I took our two girls with us and we flew to Virginia. I remember sitting in the funeral. I just felt a peace from God. Any bitterness had melted away. Anything that I was maybe holding on to, resentment, melted away. And God just gave me a piece. After the funeral, we were invited to uh one of my half brothers who I had no idea even had a half brother. We were invited back to their house uh for a family get together and we had a bunch of food and they gave us like a ton of food to take back on a plane which we couldn't even get through TSA but whatever. That's a different story. Uh and so I remember I had another half brother his name is Jonathan and afterwards we were sitting just eating talking and I wanted to know because Jonathan actually grew up with my dad. So, he was raised by him. I wanted to know like, "Hey, Jonathan, like what was he like? Tell me like what do he like to do?" He paused. I remember he thought about it. He said, "Well, he liked to sit in his recliner and watch football." I was like, "Really? What do you want your kids to say about you? What is the legacy that you are leaving?" Do you want them to say, "Oh, they were they love their phone. Like, they're on their phone a lot. They love football. They love Instagram. like what is the legacy that you're leaving? I want my kids to say he loved Jesus. He taught us the word. Uh he pointed us closer to him. So we have to focus on parenting on purpose because it's not on accident. Let's look at verse 22. Now Eli was very old. He heard about everything his sons were doing to all Israel and how they were sleeping with the women who served at the entrance to the tent of meeting. He said to them, "Why are you doing these things? I've heard about your evil actions from all these people. No, my sons, the news I hear the Lord's people is spreading is not good. If one person sins against another, God can intercede for him. But if a person sins against the Lord, who can intercede for him? But they would not listen to their father since the Lord intended to kill them. By contrast, the boy Samuel grew in stature and in favor with the Lord and with people. A man of God came to Eli and said to him, "This is what the Lord says. Didn't I reveal myself to your forefather's family when they were in Egypt and belong to Pharaoh's palace? Out of all the tribes of Isra Is Israel, I chose your house to be my priest, to offer sacrifices on my altar, to burn incense, and to wear an ephod in my presence. I also gave your forefather's family all the Israelite food offerings. Why then do you all despise my sacrifices and offerings that I require at the place of honor? You have honored your sons more than me by making yourselves fat with the best part of all the offerings of my people Israel. Eli asked his sons why they were acting so badly. But honestly, at that point, it didn't matter. Sin doesn't need an excuse. It needs to be owned, corrected, and repented of. Eli made one of the mistakes we make as parenting when we only talk. Uh he scolded his sons, but he didn't actually do anything to stop them to repent from what they were doing. He didn't take any real action. And sometimes as parents, we talk too much and we act too little. Instead of long lectures or yelling, kids needs kids need clear rules, real consequences, and boundaries with the point of those being to point them to Jesus. We don't just give kids consequences for fun. We need to pray with them and for them and tell them that you love them after you give them consequences. There is less of a mess when we discipline with a focus on disciplehip. There's less of a mess when we discipline with a focus on disciplehip. See, family was God's idea from the start. He designed it designed it to be built on a lifelong commitment between a man and a woman together working together to raise children who love him. Adoption is also part of his beautiful plan because he adopts us into his own family. Romans and Ephesians tells us that however they enter a family, every child is a gift from God and he cares deeply how they are raised. With every gift, God gives us guidance, and parenting is no exception. When God rescued his people from Egypt, he told them to make sure their children remembered what he had done. Deuteronomy 6 6-9 says this. It says, "These words I am giving you today are to be in your heart. Repeat them to your children. Talk about them when you sit in your house, when you walk along the road, when you lie down, and when you get up. Bind them as a sign on your hand and let them be a symbol on your forehead. write them on your doorpost of your house and on your city gates. So, we read that. We I'm sure you've read that verse before. Uh not new. Maybe maybe to some of you it is, but let's modernize that a little bit. Okay. So, if we look at this, uh we talk through let's say look at verse 7. It says we talk about them when we sit around your house. What does that look like? After the service, are you talking with your kids about the message? Ask them like, what did you take away today? What's one thing you learned from the message today? What's one thing you learned in kids ministry today? How are you going to apply that? Right? Um, so talk about it. Talk about Bible verses if you memorize verses. If not, I would encourage you to do that. There's some ways you can do it. There are some great uh things out there. You can just open your Bible, start doing it, or you can do things that kind of help you. There's a there's an app out there called Fighter Verses. Uh, it's a really great app to kind of focus on Bible memorization. So, I highly encourage you to download that. I think it costs like $2, but I think that's a worthy investment. So, take a look at that. Um, next one. It says uh when you walk along the road. Back then the mode of transportation was walking. Now hopefully it's driving a car or maybe you have a horse. I don't know you sat in the front row. I mean you know whatever it is when you're with your children talk about it as you're driving right when you're on a family trip or sorry let me say vacation and family trip are two different things. I don't know if you know that or not. So, uh, but make sure if you're on a family trip or vacation, uh, but you're talking about those things. One of the things we did when the kids were younger, um, there's these, uh, songs that were written, uh, just straight straight scripture. It's called Seeds of Faith. Uh, some of those songs, they get in your head because we listen to them like hundreds and hundreds of times. I bet Olivia could actually still sing some of those songs. Actually, do you want to come up? No, I'm just kidding. Uh, but they get they get in your head. Uh, and that's the point of the Bible is to get it in your mind and your heart so that you continue to think through those things and meditate on those things. So, that's one way you can do that. Uh, the next one says, "When you lie down, um, okay, so parents, I know you're tired. I know at the end of the day, you just want to be done. You want to put your kids to bed, have some quiet time. Don't rush through bedtime. Okay? That is one of the most intimate, purposeful times you can have with your kids. They're focused on you. You're not on a device. They're not on a device. Um, go and take that time. Especially dads. I know a lot of times I remember me as a dad, I'm like, "You got it, Renee. Go ahead. You put them to bed." But that is such an intimate time with your kids. Probably honestly the best time. Like they're calm, they're tired, they're quiet. You can pray with them and for them and talk through scripture as well. Um, so make sure you take that time and be intentional with it. It says when you get up. I think a lot of people they reach for what when they get up? Their phone, right? Their phone. Whoa. Yeah. Yeah. Their phone. Their phone. No. Some of us need to do that. But we reach for our phones. But God wants you to reach for the Bible in your heart and mind, right? When you wake up, say, "God, give me a verse today. Help me to think about like pray on a verse." Like just give me one. Um or if you have uh the if you have fighter verses on your phone, you can actually make your lock screen a Bible verse. So that's the first thing you see when you look at your phone. I would highly encourage you to do that. Um so when you get up, don't reach for your phone. Reach for God's word. Have him have him soak it into your heart and mind. Uh next one, verse eight, it says, "Bind them on your sign as a hand." A lot of kids uh now have uh bracelets or watches or whatever. You can put Bible verses on them. It says, "Let them be a symbol on your forehead." Maybe you have a hat that has a Bible verse on it. Says, "Write them on your doorpost or on your house or on your city gates." You can have Bible verses throughout your home. If you don't like decorating from Hobby Lobby, that's okay. No one's going to judge you for it. But if you do, whether you do or not, you can have Bible verses in your home. If you want to just write a Bible verse uh on the fridge for your kids to memorize, maybe you have a monthly verse. Um but just something to have them soak it in and to meditate on it. So just some easy quick ways we can modernize that. So God wanted future generations to stay rooted in his truth. But when one generation stops passing on God's ways, the consequences affect everyone. Parenting isn't just a personal choice. It is a God-given assignment to lead the next generation in truth and faith. Scripture gives us practical direction to parents. Ephesians 6:4 encourages fathers not to stir up anger in their kids, but to raise them with godly discipline and teaching. This means being careful not to set unreal unrealistic expectations, embarrass or shame your kids, or to be inconsistent. Kids need parents who live what they teach. When we say one thing but do another, it only causes confusion and frustration. Raising kids in the Lord means we're called to parent the way God parents us. He is patient. He is slow to anger. He is quick to forgive. He his discipline is meant to help grow and change us. His word is our source source of truth and he calls us to build our homes on it. God doesn't shy away from correction. He disciplines us because he loves us. He and he calls us parents to do the same. Psalm 94:12 reminds us that discipline and teaching are blessings, not burdens. The word discipline actually shares its roots with disciple. It's all about helping someone grow. And God's goal is to shape us to be more like Jesus. And parents play a key role in that by teaching life lessons, modeling wisdom, helping our kids walk, and being led by the Holy Spirit. When we discipline with love and consistency, it lead it leads to growth and godliness. But ignoring discipline brings harm to everyone involved. Even Eli faced God's judgment because he didn't correct his sons when they disrespected the Lord. 1st Samuel 4:18 says, "Eli fell backward off the chair by the city gate, and since he was old and heavy, he broke his neck and died. Don't allow your kids' sins to become your sins." Eli's sons kept taking the fat from the sacrifices and that they weren't supposed to. But Eli was there as well, watching them do it and taking a part of it. Kids are more than just part of the family. They are part of God's plan. He places them in our care and gives us direction for how to raise them well. The goal isn't perfection. The aim isn't perfection. The target isn't perfection. The goal is to raise our children who are wise and honor God with their lives. There is less of a mess when we set our sights on the Savior. What are you aiming for? Where are you aiming your kids? Psalm 127:3, "Sons are indeed a heritage from the Lord. Offspring a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the sons born in one's youth. Happy is the man who has filled his quiver with them." The Bible says that children are a blessing. They are not a burden. And our job is to prepare them to be launched into this world. like arrows in a quiver. We get to launch them into this world. We get to help raise them. And God says, "Here's the thing. Your children are not yours. They're gods. But God allows you to be a part of their story, part of their journey, and pushing them closer to him. Our job is to pull the bow back and to release them into this world." Verse 30 says, "Therefore, this is the declaration of the Lord, the God of Israel. I did say that your family and your forefather's family would walk before me forever. But now, this is the Lord's decoration. No longer. For those who honor me, I will honor. For those who despise me will be disgraced. Look, the days are coming when I will cut off your strength and the strength of your family's forefather, so that none in your family will reach old age. You will see distress in the place of worship in spite of all that is good in Israel. And no one in your family will ever again reach old age. Any man from your family I do not cut off from my altar will bring grief and sadness to you. All your descendants will die violently. This will be a sign that will come to you concerning your two sons, Hoffne and Phineas. Both of them will die on the same day. Then I will raise up a faithful priest for myself. He will do whatever it is in my heart and mind. I will establish a lasting dynasty for him and he will walk before my anointed one for all of time. Anyone who is left in your family will come and bow down to him for a piece of silver or a loaf of bread. He will say, "Please appoint me to some priestly office so I can have a piece of bread." Eli's aim was to please people more than pleasing God. What are you aiming for? What are you aiming your kids for? Where are you aiming them at? Whether you're a parent or not, what is your target? There's a phrase that maybe you have heard out there, but if we aim for nothing, we'll hit it every time. Are you aiming your kids for Jesus? Are you aiming your kids for wealth? Maybe. Maybe you're like, I want my kids to have a debtree Dave Ramsey life, right? Uh, are you aiming for happiness? I want my kids to be happy. Maybe someday they'll buy me jet skis. Are you aiming for a high-paying job for your kids? I want my kid to be a doctor. Are you aiming for a good spouse for your kid? I want my kid to marry a doctor. Are you aiming for great wealth for your kid? I want my kid to never see a doctor. You are called to set your sights on the Savior. And God calls you to slowly pull the bow back 6,575 times. Do you know why 6,575 times? Because that is the amount of days between birth until age 18. and you're drawing the bow back, preparing them to launch into this world for Jesus. No matter how many times you draw the bow back, ensure that that sight is set on the Savior. I want to reiterate our key thought. Just because we know of God, it does not equate to knowing God. We saw how Hannah demonstrated parenting on purpose by praying for Samuel and loving him. We saw Eli's lack of discipline and how that led to a lack of disciplehip. We saw how Eli's sons chose to set their sights on themselves and not on the Savior. If you feel like you've messed up as a parent, it's not too late. God's grace is amazing. His love for you is amazing. He has a plan for your kids and a plan for you. And he wants you to make sure that you're focusing them on the Savior. Um because God's mercies are new every morning. He gives you a fresh start every single day. We've all messed up as parents, but focus on where you're taking your kids next, launching them into this world. So, I challenge you this week to think through how you can continue to point your kids to Jesus and set your sights on the Savior. Let's pray. God, uh you are a good father. Uh we love you. Uh we love uh that we get to have uh opportunity to influence kids whether it's our own kids or kids in our lives. Um God, we just ask that you would continue to um help us to love you and to love you wholeheartedly so that we can point our kids to you. Um God, you know that it's tough sometimes u but you are faithful and you are good and you are gracious. And so we ask this week that you would uh be with those that maybe feel um that they've made a mess of their lives, but that it's not too late as your mercies are new every day. God, give us the strength uh to love and to help our kids grow in you as they launch into this world. We love you. Jesus name we pray. Amen. Now, let's all stand together. [Music] All the saints and [Music] angels bow before your throne. All the elders cast their crowns before the lamb of God and sing. You're worthy of it all. You're worthy of it all. For from you are all things and to you are all things. You deserve the glory. Sing that all the saints and angels. All the saints and [Music] angels bow before your throne. All the world is cast their crowns before the lamb of God and sin. You're worthy of it all. You're worthy of it all. For from you are all things and to you are all things. You deserve the glory. You're worthy. You're worthy. You're worthy of it all. You're worthy of it all. You're worthy of it all. Jesus, for from you are all things, and to you are all things. You deserve the [Music] glory. Day and night, night and day, let in rise. Day and night, night and day, let in rise. Day and night, night and day, let in rise. Day and night, night and day, let it seem to rise. Come on. Day and night, night and day, let it srise. [Music] Day and night, night and day, it seems to rise. Day and night, night and day, it seems to rise. Day and night, night and [Music] day. You're worthy of it all. You're worthy of it all. Yes, you're worthy. For from you are all things and to you are all praise. You deserve the glory. You're worthy. You're worth. You're worthy of it all. You're worthy of it all. For from you are all praise and to you all. You deserve the [Music] glory. Hey, thank you guys so much for joining us today. Hope you guys have a great week. We'll see you guys next week.